Parts work - Understanding your ego states
Meeting the Inner Family
As an Integrative Therapist I trained in multi-modalities enabling me to integrate different aspects to be able to offer my clients an approach that is tailored to their individual needs. One of the concepts I have found to be most successful in the therapy room is based on 'parts work'. Within Eric Berne's Transactional Analysis (TA) approach we understand that our personality is made up of three main parts, or ego states:
the Parent, the Adult and the Child
Each of these is a real psychological mode - a cluster of feelings, thoughts and behaviours that come forward in different situations. They are all you, but each has its own voice, energy and purpose. Learning to recognise them helps you understand why you react the way you do and how to bring more harmony and balance inside yourself.
Integrating story, metaphor and parts work can have a transformational effect in the therapy space. Here I will introduce the concept of this integration inviting you to choose animals to represent each of these ego states.
Using animals in this way brings playfulness and imagination into the process of self-discovery, turning what might feel like deep psychological work into something creative, gentle and healing.
Our animal characters allow us to express our inner experiences symbolically, without judgment or overthinking, helping each part of us feel seen in a safe and meaningful way. Through this imagery, the Inner Child gets to play, the Parent can relax its seriousness, and the Adult can observe with curiosity and compassion. Meeting our inner selves as animals softens resistance, opens the heart and bridges purpose with play, transforming insight into something both emotionally soothing and spiritually grounding.
This reminds us that healing doesn’t always have to be heavy - it can be imaginative and playful
The Parent
This is the internalised voice of authority - the echoes of parents, teachers and other figures who guided or corrected us when we were young. It can appear in two forms:
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The Critical Parent: Firm, rule-bound, sometimes harsh. It wants to keep you safe by enforcing control or standards.
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The Nurturing Parent: Kind, supportive, reassuring. It wants to comfort, protect and encourage.
Example animal symbolism:
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Critical Parent: Eagle - sharp-eyed, vigilant, protective but can swoop too fast.
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Nurturing Parent: Elephant - wise, steady, caring, remembers and guides with compassion.
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When dominant: You might hear strong inner criticism or find yourself judging others or yourself harshly.
When hidden: You might feel lost, unsupported, or crave structure.
The Adult
This is your calm, rational, present-centered self. The wise mediator between Parent and Child.
The Adult gathers information, weighs options, makes logical decisions and can comfort or calm the other parts without judgment.
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Example animal symbolism:
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Owl - perceptive, steady, balanced, sees from all sides.
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When dominant: You respond, not react. You stay grounded, realistic and compassionate.
When hidden: You may feel confused, pulled by emotion or inner criticism, unable to decide clearly.
The Child
This is the emotional, creative, spontaneous part of you - the Inner Child. It holds your earliest feelings, joys, fears and impulses. It’s the source of your curiosity and vulnerability.
There are also two common sides here:
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Free Child: Playful, open, expressive, loving and creative.
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Adapted Child: Obedient, anxious, tries to please or avoid trouble.
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Example animal symbolism:
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Free Child: Dolphin - joyful, expressive, loves connection and play.
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Adapted Child: Rabbit - sensitive, cautious, quick to hide when afraid.
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When dominant: Emotions may rule decisions. Joy, fear, or frustration can take the lead.
When hidden: You may feel emotionally flat or disconnected from joy and play.
How these parts interact
At times, one of these ego states may take over:
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The Eagle (Critical Parent) may scold the Rabbit (Adapted Child)
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The Dolphin (Free Child) may get silenced by the Eagle (critical parent)
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The Owl (Adult) may step back and gently invite the Elephant (Nurturing Parent) to calm the others.
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In a healthy inner system, these animals learn to cooperate, not compete. Each one has a role - the key is balance and dialogue.
The Goal: Integration
​Integration doesn’t mean silencing any part of you. It means bringing them into harmony.
When the Owl (Adult) listens to the Eagle, the Elephant, the Dolphin and the Rabbit, everyone gets heard and no one has to shout - they all have a seat at the table!
Your energy becomes unified. Decisions come from clarity, not chaos. You live more peacefully within yourself.
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Integration is not about becoming someone new - it’s about letting all the parts of you come home
Invitation to explore
You might like to close your eyes and imagine:
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What animal represents your Critical Parent?
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What animal represents your Nurturing Parent?
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What animal is your Inner Child, both Free and Adapted?
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What animal is your Adult, the calm observer and guide?
Then ask yourself:
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Which one usually leads?
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Which hides or gets ignored?
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What might each one need to feel safe, seen and balanced?
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You can draw them, journal their dialogue, or simply visualise them gathering in a peaceful circle, learning to trust one another. If you feel playful write yourself a Therapeutic Story to illustrate their interactions.
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You can discover more about your 'animal' parts by working with me either in
